Iowa Heritage Digital Collections
State Library of Iowa

1913 Yearbook

1913 Yearbook

Title

1913 Yearbook

Description

DIARY—Continued.
9th. Kerrigan, our Vocalist, discovers a new use for mustard. Good for the cramps;
not voice!
11th. Pool-room scene. Actors: Fr. Mc. and Togo. Time: Evening. Atmosphere:
Mainly one of suspense. Exit: Sudden.
12th. Eleborate and ornate discussion by H. C. B. and A. V., assisted by M. H. and M.
G. M., on the theme: "When is a fellow an Athlete?" The Judges award a red
rose of hope to H. C. B. for having so ably discovered malicious misrepresentations in his opponents; a bunch of forget-me-nots of hair to A. V.; a new
Baby Premo Camera to M. H. for having given the best views, and a "cream-puff"
to M. G. M. as consolation prize.
Good-bye, Fellows. It's time to quit.
13th. "Tis a memorable day!"
Humorous.
It happened in the Astronomy Class
one fine Saturday morning. That very enjoyable hour between 10:15 and 11:15 a.
m. was being devoted to the taking apart
and explaining of the various parts of the
Telescope. The explanation was as follows: "Now, the pupil of the eye has a
diameter of one-fifth of an inch, and the
diameter of the objective of this Telescope, which I hold in my hands, is three
inches. So now to find out how much
larger this objective is than the pupil of
the eye, of course, just say 1-5x1-5 is 1-25,
and 3x3 is 9 square inches, and 9 times
1-25 is 225. Therefore, the objective lens
makes an object 225 times larger than the
human eye." Noticing some inattention,
the Professor said: "Gentlemen, understand that I am not trying to sell this
Telescope. I am merely trying to make
you understand what it can do."
After Taking Numbers at
Table on Extras
Fever—What's the number, Coughlin?
Coughlin—Forty-five.
Fever—I didn't ask for your age, I
just wanted the number.
Chorus—Har! Har! Har!
Coughlin—Go up and report.
Smokerettes
Pat—Say, Nigger, I was just talking
to Bill a few minutes ago, and we happened to mention Scoop's name during our
conversation, and Scoop heard it and, coming over, he gave me the darnd'st kick I
ever got!
Nigger—Well, let me give you a little
advice, Pat; whenever you have something
to say about a mule, don't say it behind
his back.

Date

1913

Rights

St. Ambrose University, 518 W. Locust St., Davenport, IA 52803

Identifier

http://cdm16810.contentdm.oclc.org/cdm/ref/collection/p16810coll2/id/3867