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State Library of Iowa

1914 Yearbook

1914 Yearbook


1914 Yearbook


aforesaid, comes up, it will ever be
found on the side of the Weak, fighting the tyranny of the Strong.
The "Phil" advises the removal of
the trees from the hill because smoking is done around them. Great
heavens! has it come to this? Are
the dearest rights of an American
citizen to be abolished in this summary manner? Let us call attention
to a principle, announced in that
powerful document, the Declaration
of Independence, which reads, that
"all men are created free and equal,
endowed with certain inalienable
rights, among which are life, liberty, and the pursuits of happiness."
When the framers of that great
Declaration of Independence were at
work on that clause, they must have
had in mind the pastime of smoking
on the hill.
Smoking is certainly a "pursuit of
happiness." People do not smoke
for wages—that is, except that they
be traveling salesmen for a tobacco
firm. Nobody is obliged to smoke.
Parties who object to smoking are
usually old, and have been thoroughly saturated, and resemble a lemon
that has done duty in citrus lemonade.
A man who objects to a little soul
smoking on a hill covered with green
grass and shaded by majestic oaks,
may have a soul, but it certainly is
soulless. To a student of Nature
there is no sight more inviting, more
entrancing, more fascinating, than to
see a group of young men lounging
on the grass, after the sun has gone
to bed and the moon has pulled a
fleecy cloud over her face for a veil,
so as not to disturb "the peacemakers. W. H.
Tiz: "I used to hate to be called
redhead, but now I kind of like it."
Jew: "Same as I. The girls used
to make me angry when they called
me 'cuttie,' but now I somehow like
"Some fellows need only a minute
to dress and are down at chapel on
time." (Big applause.)
Fr. Adrian: I guess I will be a
humorous fellow, if I keep this job
very long.
Sen. Neuzil: What committee is
Liggutti on?
Rosy: I don't know, but judging
from those gunboats he wears, I
think he's on the naval.
Russell: Why do you keep the
Infirmary locked during the exams,
Rosy? Those fellows won't try to
get out.
Rosy: I know they won't, but
there's a bunch that want to get in.
Neuzil: Which would you rather
be, Rosy, an engineer or a captain of
a large ship?
Rosy: Neither one. I'd rather be
a captain of a schooner.
Prof.: Mr. Millet, what is an atomizer?
Susie: It's an instrument for measuring atoms.
Physics Prof.: What is the absolute zero?
Kautz: 274.
Prof.: Correct. Could you give
me an example of something that
Kautz: Yes; the water in the
bathroom on Saturday.
Prof.: How does it come that I
saw you smoking in your room last
Hook: I don't know, unless you
were looking in the window.
Thomann: How many are sick today, Rosy?
Rosy: I don't know how many
are sick. There are five in bed.
Welsh: Himschoot ought to be a
success in life.
Murphy: How's that?
Welsh: Why, he goes up the ladder of success a step and a half at a